Pleasure is for everyone, and although folks may have stereotypes about disabled people, most sex positions can be adjusted so disabled people can enjoy them. Being disabled doesn’t make you asexual or mean you’re less interested in sex, so we’re collecting some of our favorite accessible sex positions everyone can enjoy! With an estimated 61 million adults in the United States living with at least one type of disability according to the CDC, it’s time we talk about making sex accessible for such a large demographic.
Remember, how able-bodied we are can vary day to day, so it’s totally fine for couples to use these adjusted sex positions on a day say, one partner is experiencing menstrual pain and doesn’t want to stand. These adapted ideas are really the best sex positions for partners of all stripes!
Heads up: Oral sex from your wheelchair
Everybody deserves good head, and it’s totally possible to give great oral sex to your partner from a wheelchair. The partner with more mobility can sit or lie down on the bed and bring their butt close to the edge, dangling their legs off the side or placing their feet firmly on the ground. The partner using a wheelchair comes to the edge of the bed and delivers oral sex, perhaps using their hands to assist in touching and massaging sensitive erogenous zones.
If performing oral on a partner with a clitoris, the partner in a wheelchair could use their fingers to stroke the G-spot internally, or use their tongue and mouth on the clitoris in combination with a toy like Onda. Onda was designed to mimic a human finger and strokes the G-spot for powerful orgasms, which if used with oral sex could make for a delicious blended orgasm! If you’re ready to give your partner an O they won’t forget, check out Onda on the Lora DiCarlo shop page!
If performing oral on a partner with a penis, you can still give awesome dual stimulation that’ll result in a mind-blowing O. Tilt is made to please all bodies and anatomies, because if there’s one thing we all have—it’s a butt! Partners with a penis will love prostate stimulation from Tilt’s gently warming, vibrating anal plug that pairs with a scultped, external arm that buzzes against the perineum. If you’re dying to give your partner an oral O they don’t forget, check out Tilt, and don’t forget to lube up for those sensitive anal tissues!
Wear Your Voice Magazine gives a great oral sex tip we love: if you have spasms, be sure to note where your body spasms while orgasming so as to avoid issues with your chair or with your partner!
Big spoon, little spoon: Side-by-side for intimate sex
Spooning is one of the best sex positions when you want a low-impact, gentle, intimate moment. RO’s Health Guide says this is a great option for people with arthritis because it’s low movement and the bed absorbs pressure on the joints.
Partners lie on the bed facing the same direction, so that one’s butt is toward the other’s genitals. One partner could use a hand or wrap a leg over the other partner’s thigh for extra balance and leverage. We love this because it works for cisgender heterosexual couples enjoying p-in-v penetration, but it also works for queer couples who want to use a strap on dildo or want to put a soothing, gentle spin on anal sex. The partner penetrating will be the big spoon, and the partner receiving the penetration will be the little spoon.
Partners can use their hands to add extra stimulation. The partner penetrating could reach a hand around to stimulate a clitoris or penis with their hand or fingers, and the little spoon can use their hands to stimulate themselves or touch available parts of the partner behind them. If the partner receiving has a vulva, we recommend adding best-selling Baci, a Cara Delevingne favorite, for extra clitorial stimulation. This could easily deliver a blended orgasm, but will certainly provide dual stimulation! Baci was designed to mimic a human mouth and uses a sucking sensation to give great oral sex while the big spoon penetrates. If you’re ready to up the ante on your spooning, Baci is for you!
Let’s face it: Facing a partner in a wheelchair
If you want to deliver an amazing experience for your partner who uses a wheelchair, there are so many ways to climb on top! The partner with limited mobility sits in the chair, perhaps with arm rests removed, and the other climbs on top to face them and straddle them. This is one of the best sex positions for partners where the person in the chair has a penis or is using a strap-on dildo.
Of course, the partner on top can also go reverse-cowgirl, placing their feet on the floor and sitting down on the partner in the chair with their butt facing that partner’s chest. This would allow the partner on top to grab a bed or table in front of them and use it to balance and bounce.
Now, you can imagine we’re about to tell you all the ways you can snag that sweet, sweet dual stimulation in this position—and that’s because dual stimulation creates such powerful, blended orgasms! We’re big fans.
Drift is hands-down the best vibrator to introduce to this position. It’s a classic bullet vibrator, but it’s also so much more. Drift gently warms to just above body temperature, just like Tilt, and it features multiple intensity settings so you can choose your vibe. Plus, it’s waterproof! But the real reason you want Drift for this position is because of its versatility. If the partner on top is facing the partner in the wheelchair, they may have a free hand to stimulate a clitoris, or the partner in the chair can use it on either. If in the reverse-cowgirl position, the same is true! Either partner may be able to hold Drift against the partner on top’s clitoris, or on their own if the partner in the chair has a clitoris. If you need a more-than-meets-the-eye vibrator that accommodates many positions, Drift is your new go-to!
Best sex positions for mixed-ability couples: Play on, partners!
We hope you’ll use these accessible sex positions to spice up your sex life, whatever types of ability the partners in a relationship has. Sex drive doesn’t neccessarily decrease with limited mobility, and everybody deserves powerful orgasms!